I don't know about you, but I have a hard time defining my love for God. Our Girlfriend Devotional for today from Living with a Purpose presents a great challenge. Not great in the sense of something "hard", but something that if realized can so deepen our relationship with God.
When I think of "feeling" love, I think of the love I feel for my husband, the love I feel for my children, the love I feel for my father and mother, which is different than the love I have for my brother. Each of these kinds of loves are different in their own way. One is as a sibling, another a daughter, another a wife, another a mother.
I have no problem singing about worshipping and honouring and dedicating my life to God and serving Him, but even though I know I couldn't live without Him--what would life be like without my hope in him--I have a hard time pinning down what my love for Him feels like.
I'm grateful for his provision and am amazed at his faithfulness to me, particularly in the last few weeks, but is that really love?
I often think I'm hindered in my Christian life because I've never faced addiction or abuse. I've never strayed from God. I've only ever striven to serve Him and have done so faithfully through music and teaching all my life. Others say that I can serve as an example to others who have gone through those experiences. Perhaps I can and am. But, I always find those who have gone through significant trials--trials more "drastic" than mine--seem to have something I don't have. Perhaps it's a reckless abandon to trust or a way of looking back at what they were and what they are now and seeing the transformation.
The transformation for me isn't nearly as dramatic or noticeable--but then I have to remind myself, that doesn't mean it isn't there.
So, I guess the short of it is that I will be praying in the following days for the Lord to teach me how to finally "love" Him. I want to know what that love feels like. It will probably be different than how I love my husband and children. Perhaps I will discover that my gratefulness to Him is how my love for Him feels.
Guess I'll find out!
What do you think
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